Shy

I am often laughed at in social gatherings because I fail to initiate conversations with people who are new to me.

“You are a very shy person, aren’t you?”
“You hardly talk. Don’t you like people?”

And then they wait for an answer with their eyes narrowed, faint smiles trying hard to convince me that I am not being mocked.

It would rather be disastrous if I told them how I fall in love with something about every person I come across.
That girl at the bus stand; I have never seen anyone else hold an umbrella the way she did. And the fact that it was something unique about her – just the way she held the umbrella made her different from everyone else.
Or may be the chai-wala outside my office who offers a smile with every cup of tea. What if he wouldn’t do that? His tea would still be as rich, it would still cost the same, and people would still drink at his stall. In spite of that he complements every cup with a smile. But I have seen most people miss that chance to witness his mild gesture. They are either busy with their mobiles or lighting their cigarettes.

I prefer funerals to marriage parties, because I feel the former needs my silent presence more than the latter. It gifts a smile to my friend who has just lost his grandfather.
There is a dam a few miles away from home. I visit it after every funeral I attend. I stand on the lock gates and gaze at the gushing stream of water below. The bridge vibrates under my feet, and every time I fall in love with the peace in the sound of the raging waters below.

It might seem strange to you, the aspect of being quiet and shy. But tell me, is it wrong to just fall in love instead?

 


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